Children are an invaluable gift of Almighty Allah for parents. Sometimes a person prays lifelong prayers for having children, but his yearning is not fulfilled by the will of Allah Almighty, On the other hand, some people have long patience in obtaining this blessing and kindness. When by the grace of Allah, if someone gets this Blessing, then our society as a whole rejoices and sweets are distributed among relatives and others, at the birth of children. Some parents become so selfless in the joy of the birth of their children that they have no sense of violating the Shari'ah’s limits and then in every year on the eve of their birthday all kinds of un-Islamic and wicked attitudes are promoted and the money is wasted. but after a while our general attitude towards children changes. on the one side parents attitude touches the extremes of pampering and affection, and on the other hand it is reluctance and unaffectionate, but both are extremely dangerous behaviors.
Remember that. in this young age, children's minds are like a simple whiteboard. Whatever is written on this board, the children will adopt it. Therefore, children should not be given too much freedom and should not be scolded and reprimanded, but an effective strategy should be adopted instead of expressing hatred over their shortcomings and mistakes.
Depending on their age, a friendly and compassionate attitude should be adopted towards them. by humanizing gentleness, morality, love and compassion towards them, its Parents primary responsibility, to make them obedient and submissive to Allah and His Messenger. Islam is our guiding principle in every sphere of life. Just as Islam make it obligatory for children to serve their parents with respect and obedience, so the training of children is also obligatory for parents as explained in the teachings of the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him). There is a need for parents to play a key role in establishing an ideal society by training their children in accordance with the sayings and teachings of the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him).
It is very important for the father, along with the parents and the character, to take care of the fact that the money should be spent on his family first. The same thing has been explained by lord of two worlds in his saying:
"If a man has three dinars, and if one dinar is spent for the sake of Allah, in terms of Jehad, and one dinar is given to a poor person, and one dinar is spent on his family, In that case, the best dinar in terms of reward is the one that is spent on the family." (Al Muslim Alshareef)
When the Lord of Glory bestowing this blessing of the children by His grace and mercy, then according to the command of the Prophet, say the adhan and iqamah in the ears of the newborn, then cleaned the hair of his head and give its value in charity. It is the responsibility of the parents to make aqeeqah for their children.
It is narrated on the authority of Abu Rafi 'that he said: I saw the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) say the adhaan in Hasan ibn Ali’s ear after his birth (Sunan Abi Dawood)
When Imam Hussain (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was born, the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) himself perform his aqeeqah and said: O Fatima, shave her head and give its equal weight of silver and silver as charity, (Meshqaat shareef).
It is narrated on the authority of Umar and Sa'id bin Al-Aas that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “A father has no gift above all to teach his children good manners.” (Jami Tirmidhi and Hakim). He said, " O’ Muslims! Allah wants you not to lose justice in dealing with your children."(Tiberani).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Teach your children to offer their prayers when they are seven years old. And punish them for neglecting the prayer, when they are ten years old, and when they reach the age, separate their beds, (Meshqaat shareef).
It is narrated on the authority of Nu'man ibn Bashir that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Do justice between your children in the matter of giving as you wish that they should all be kind to you, (Tabarani).
It is narrated on the authority of Nu'man ibn Bashir that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Do justice to your children, even in love, (Ibn al-Najjar).
It is narrated on the authority of Anas that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Respect your children and teach them manners (Sunan Ibn Majah)
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: The three children of the Muslims who have already died will be brought to the Day of Resurrection and will be stand at the gates of Paradise and be told to enter it. They said we will not enter until our parents enter it, then they will be told, "Okay, you and your parents will enter Paradise.”, (Tabarani).
The Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: When a daughter is born to someone and the Lord of Glory sends angels to her, they say: blessings of Allah be upon you, O family! Then they take her in the shadow of their wings and touch his head and say: You are a weak soul and you are born from a weak soul that who will take care and nurtured you, Allah's help will be with him till the day of resurrection, (Tabarani).
In our society even today, such incidents are common in which a woman is beaten and are ridiculed when she gives birth to a daughter. Such a people need to correct their behavior by reciting this hadith. Otherwise, in the Hereafter, how will they answer to Allah, the Lord of Glory?
It is narrated on the authority of Ibn 'Abbas that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Give your children equally. If I can give preference, I would give it to the daughters.”, (Tabarani).
It is narrated on the authority of Umm Al-Mumineen Hazrat Ayesha that once an Arab said to the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) that People kiss children, but we do not kiss them. Upon this Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) said “What should I do if Allah Almighty has taken mercy from your heart?” (Al Muslim and Al Bukhari Alshareef).
It is narrated from Umm Al-Mumineen Ayesha Siddiqa that once a poor woman came to me with two girls. I gave her three dates. She divided the two dates between her two daughters and started eating one. But her daughters asked for that date too so she divided the date into two parts and give it to them. When the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) returned home, I told him about this incident and he said that “Allah Almighty has made Paradise obligatory for that woman and has freed her from the fire if Hell” (Muslim Al-Sharif).
Parents who train their daughter well and bring her up well will be safe from the fire of Hell, (Tabarani). It is narrated on the authority of Ibn 'Abbas that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Whoever has a daughter and he does not bury her alive, does not insult her and does not give preference to other children over her, then Allah will reside him in Paradise.
It is the duty of the parents to take care of their marriages after the children have reached the adult age. Therefore, it is stated in the hadith that:
It is narrated on the authority of Ibn 'Abbas that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Whoever has a child should give him/her a good name, teach him/her good manners and marry him/her when it becomes an adult-age. If the child becomes an adult and he does not get married and commits fornication, then his father will also be guilty, (Meshqaat shareef).
The bottom line is that no doubt parents deserve respect and dignity, but it is their duty to train their children to make them good Muslims., and to provide them education and training. It is not enough to teach them adornment of knowledge, but to install them with the virtues and the feeling that they know the way of respecting their teachers, their elders, their neighbors, and their relatives. So that they make their parents' name recognized through their practical role in human society.
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